But James has been struggling with school more and more each year. Not THIS school, just school in general.
ELA ruins my life, he cries to me. I want to stay home. I can't go to school because I will be gone from you for too long. I feel sick. Johnny's school is closer. He doesn't get as much work as me. I want to move where there is no school. I can't breathe because I'm thinking about school. I feel sick in the car. I can't ride in it anymore, I need to get air.
This is what he tells me every morning during our hour long drive to drop Johnny off at his school and then cross the city to James'. Every day I see him blink repeatedly to stop the tears as he gets out of the car to go into the building.
And every day my heart breaks for him and I wonder if it is all worth it.
So last week I stopped wondering.
I transferred James into a school in our own neighborhood. He starts on Monday. It is also a fully inclusive school and my friends who have kids there feel as strongly about their school as we do about the one we are coming from. I know we will have a lot of support from both the community we are leaving and the one we are joining.
But there will still be ELA (English language arts). School will still take up most of his day away from home. It is going to be a really big transition and there will be blinking to hold back tears. It is going to be hard at first.
However, I think it will get easier, and I know that knowing he is 5 minutes from home instead of 45 will make a major difference for James. I know that being able to have friends who live around the corner come to our house after school is going to be a game changer for him.
And that's definitely worth it.